My friend Joel is an incredibly talented song writer. (He also has biceps of steel). When he gets his a$s in gear and develops a website or Facebook page I’ll give you the link. But until then, he’s letting me share some of the lyrics to my 2nd favorite song:
“Crazy girl, crazy girl
Just go home
Why you in my window?
And why you on my phone?
You tell me you love me
You’re everywhere I roam
Crazy girl, crazy girl
Just go home…”
I love it. The song goes on to talk about how she makes a voodoo doll of him and stalks him when he’s on dates with other people. Yeah, yeah. We get it. Girls are crazy. And some of us don't hide it. But like we discussed in Part 1 – it’s because you make us that way. I could have this conversation all day. But the more important question is: why doesn’t anyone ever talk about guys that do crazy sh*t? I know you don’t think it’s because they
Case in point #1. I just got a wink from a guy that goes to my gym. Seemingly harmless, but he’s gone to my gym for 7 years. He’s asked me out before - in person. Incidentally he’s also hit on and asked out every other girl in our gym without a ring on her finger for the past 7 years. (All those hours on the stair climber allow for a lot of observation). So… if I turned you down in person and I continue to ignore you, walk the other way, or politely put my headphones back in my ears any time you are within a 10 foot radius of me, what makes you think I am going to wink back at you on the internet!? YOU are going to be single forever, sir.
Case in point #2. I would not have believed it if I had not seen it myself. Guess who winked at me today??? Oh yes. Our very favorite, creeper-extrordinaire - TwinkleToes. Several things here. First of all, I did not engage in conversation with you 6 months ago, nor did I show even the slightest amount of interest. Any of the 14 times you tried to wink at, email, or IM me. What in this person’s mind makes him think I’ve changed my mind? Because I’m still on here 6 months later so I’m that much more desperate that he might have a shot now? I don’t know if this rational sounds worse for him… or for me…. (BTW - stay tuned for a post about the relationship between desperation and online-dating. It’s coming). But second, and more importantly, you remember that I BLOCKED THIS PERSON FROM CONTACTING ME, right?? WTF website!!!!!! If encouraging stalking is something that you promote, then I think we’ve got a potential lawsuit here. And it just so happens I know a lot of lawyers. NOT including TwinkleToes.
And #3. Because I know you’ve been on the edge of your chair wondering if I ever got an answer as to how I got Busted. Why yes, yes I did. A 1,120 word essay, to be exact. As much as I wanted to copy/paste the whole thing it was just too long. Here are the more relevant paragraphs. You'llLikeThis:
I…. am speechless. My friends and I are trying to decide if he’s crazy, slightly stalker-ish (despite his plea to the contrary), or just really, really bored. Either way I have to admit I found it flattering. And I also have to admit that I’m spending way more time writing this blog than I am responding to emails from guys who might actually be prospects. So give me a few days to work on that. Otherwise:
I’m going to be single forever…